Once again if you don't want to read about bodily fluids please stop now. This is so awful I've wondered about writing it at all but as I follow a lot of your blogs and a lot of you have kids that you're trying to potty train and are having a frustrating time I figured I could write this and you could think to yourself: at least it's not THAT bad. Or if you have a story (and I'm not talking about my friends sisters cousin stories) that makes this look good, I would LOVE to hear it and think to myself, "Whew, at least he didn't do that . . . " Vinson is going to hate me when he grows up if he ever finds out the things I tell the entire world about him.
Vinson has started working lately. He gets on his motorcycle and says, "Bye mom, I'm going to work." Then he'll usually give me a kiss, the same routine as when Dan goes to work. Then he proceeds to put all of his toys into my bedroom sometimes taking one toy at a time and making a big pile of toys. One Saturday Vince said, "Bye Mom, bye Dad, I'm going to work." We started chatting and after a while realized we'd been talking for a while without seeing Vinson come back for toys. So then Vinson says, "Mom, Dad, pojd" (Czech for come here). So we went together. We opened the door and there was Vinson beaming and looking like he'd done something wonderful. This is what he had done. He pooped his pants and then had taken them off. Sometime during this he thought to himself,
this is kind of like the paints that mom lets me play with, maybe I'll do some art work. So then he proceeded to "paint" the floor, one of his toys, and his motorcycle with poop. Dan and I were horror struck. We kind of stood there in silence for a minute torn between laughing, and crying and what to say or do to punish and how much. It's hard to gage exactly how much Vinson grasped that this was wrong especially after his obvious pride in his work. Dan said, "Vinson, you've done a very bad thing. Poop is not paint, you only put poop in the toilet." I turned my head to smile. Dan cleaned up Vinson - his punishment was having a cold shower. I started cleaning the floor with bleach and threw away the sponge afterwards. His motorcycle and toy also had a bleach bath followed by a real bath. Then I heard Dan say, "You made a big mess. You should ask mom if there's anything you can do to help clean up." My mind searched for ways he could help. The only thing that came to me that actually would help was something that I knew that Vince woud think it was fun, I didn't want to support him doing this sort of activity again ever, but I went for it. He had to swirl his underwear in the toiled with a plastic knife (then I could throw it away), lift, flush, swirl, lift flush etc. until I could handle cleaning them. Dan had to supervise. He should have thought before offering Vince's services. Maybe you're asking, why not just throw the underwear away. I would have but my mom brought me nice American tiolet training pants. They have padding that holds the water in so there isn't a wetness all over the floor. Europeans don't have potty training underwear. Their kids run around their house with nothing on bottom and a kiddie pottie in every room of the house. When they do go to underwear it's skimpy bikini underwear. At least that's what I've observed and found. All I have to say about this experience is YUCK!!! GROSS!!! EWW!!! UGH!!! I did take a picture. From the picture it might not look that bad, but believe me it was!
